MKE – Week 17 – Simple isn’t always easy

As I spent this week with Part 17 of Haanel’s Master Key System, 17:11 kept creeping into my mind.  So, I had to take some time with it.  Break it down.  Find out what it was saying to me.

11.  Concentration does not mean mere thinking of thoughts, but the transmutation of these thoughts into practical values; the average person has no conception of the meaning of concentration.  There is always the cry “to have” but never the cry “to be;” they fail to understand that they cannot have one without the other, that they must first find the “kingdom” before they can have the “things added.”  Momentary enthusiasm is of no value; it is only with unbounded self-confidence that the goal is reached.

I rolled the words around in my head, trying to digest them…. did Haanel really say that people don’t know how to concentrate?  Does he think people are just whinny, lazy souls always wanting, wanting, wanting – never willing to become?

I really felt as though he was being hard on people for being people.

Then it hit me —

Kingdom.

Things added.

Matthew 6:33 – But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be provided for you.

It’s not about the things.

The concentration isn’t about the things.

It’s the relationship.

See, God knows your heart.  He knows the desires of my heart – more so than I even know myself.  And He longs to give us the desires of our hearts – if we just ask.  But we must ask in those moments of concentrated prayer.  But the asking is not the key.

It’s the relationship.

There is always the cry to have but never the cry to be…. there is always the prayer to God to give me this or do this thing or that thing.  There is never the cry to just be in His presence.

We are so selfish as humans.  Self-centered.

It’s the relationship.

There should be no conscious effort to convince God to give to us whatever it is we think we want, but to RELAX in Him – be with Him – establish, nurture, and cherish the relationship.   And in His infinite love, the desires of your heart will be fulfilled.

Sounds simple, huh?

But we struggle with this concept in this life.  That is, until we obtain, and put into practice, the knowledge we are blessed with through the MKE.

Thanks for stopping by!

 

 

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MKE – Week 16 – Floating

Throughout these past 16+ weeks going through the MKE course – spending days with Og, trying to comprehend Haanel – I have found myself advancing and then slipping back again.  Pretty steadily.  It has been an interesting ride so far.

This week, I have been floating.

Exactly what does that mean?

Good question.

When I tried to pull my words together for this weeks blog post, it seemed as though all the words were out of reach.  Some of them I’ve risen above (in a good way – not an arrogant way), and others are still out of reach.  I’m floating in the middle.  Questioning….  Pondering….   You see, Haanel’s words in 16:5 —

“5. Wealth should then never be desired as an end, but simply as a means of accomplishing an end. Success is contingent upon a higher ideal than the mere accumulation of riches, and he who aspires to such success must formulate an ideal for which he is willing to strive.”

have me deciphering (idealization, concentration and visualization) those “end goals” I wrote about in my DMP.  Those “things” I thought I “wanted.”  But as I visualize being in that place, it’s what I see happening there that is my hearts desire.  Not the physical structure that we are in, but the love and harmony of the people inside – the friends, the family, new and old.

Still floating.

On another note, as I participate in our tribe’s marco polos and hear the growth and enlightenment of so many, I am blown away.  And again, I’m floating….  aspiring to have gained the levels of wisdom I hear from them, yet thrilled that I have given myself permission to wear whatever style of clothes I choose.  It seems so menial in comparison, but I know, in my walk…. I have grown.

Not where I desire to be in that walk…. yet, still reaching.

But much further than day one.  Each week I continue to advance.  Once again having risen above where I was, while the goal is still a little further of a reach.  Floating.

But wait…..

What’s this?

Wings?

I’m soaring………

 

MKE – Week 15 – New month, new Og

Happy New Year!

Before we move into the new scroll, let me share a slightly altered quote from scroll three:

“I will forget the happenings of the [year] that is gone, whether they were good or bad, and greet the new [year] with confidence that this will be the best [year] of my life.”

I am excited about what 2019 holds!  The tools and growth I have obtained through the MKE thus far has given me a fantastic new perspective to look at life and all it has to offer; but most importantly, how I can be in the driver’s seat and make the decisions on which roads to take instead of letting life drag me around like it’s favorite ragdoll.

The Scroll Marked IV may be my most fond lesson to grasp to date:  I am nature’s greatest miracle!  I am a unique creature of nature.  Og tells us that we have only used a small portion of our brains and our muscles.  I see this as being a result of “life” telling us not to.

Don’t think outside the box

Do what you’re told

Don’t color outside the lines

Do what is expected

 

Don’t reinvent the wheel

Don’t stand out in the crowd

Fit in

And we’re mocked or chastised – even as children – when we step outside the boundaries of what is normal, expected, allowed, tolerated….

I rejoice in the new-found permission I have given myself to be my unique self!  And I am working daily on discovering exactly who that is and what those decisions might entail.  But excitedly awaiting to see where they lead!

One area of scroll four that I do see myself needing to explore is the need to leave my work at work and my home life at home.  I have been fortunate enough to find a business that my husband (aka Mr. Wonderful) and I can work at together and it is a part of our daily lives.  I honestly don’t feel a need to separate the two.  We enjoy what we do and work well together in that capacity.  Hopefully, Og was in a different place and this does not pertain to me.  But I will keep an open mind as I re-read these words throughout the month and see what wisdom comes to me as I sit with Og on these thoughts.

It’s going to be an awesome year!

Thanks for stopping by!

 

 

MKE – Week 14 – I burned the bacon….to a crisp!

I am not where I should be or could be.

I am not exactly where I want to be.

But I am in a much different place since beginning this course than I was when I started, therefore, I am where I need to be.

This course has been a journey so far – and we’re just half-way through!  I didn’t know what I would find, if anything.  I think a part of me thought it was just a basic ‘self-help/self-awareness’ course, and I’ve read plenty of those books.  How difficult could it be?  And how were they going to drag this out for six whole months? haha  Now I’m thinking, hey, can we go back to week 1 and let me start over?

Every day I am learning…recognizing….the effects of deeply ingrained causes in my subconscious.  And as I watched the movie, Wild, and heard comments from others about resonating with Cheryl Strayed’s story, I couldn’t find a personal connection with Cheryl.  But her mother, Bobbi, made a statement that really touched a nerve with me when she said, “I was never in the driver’s seat of my own life.”

Boom!

I never made a decision for myself.  It’s how I was raised.  My mom told me what I would and wouldn’t do, could and couldn’t do.  Who I wasn’t going to be, who I was going to be.  And when I strayed from her demands/commands, it wasn’t pretty.

So I left home fairly young, but I didn’t know how to make a decision, so I tended to “go with the flow.”  Wherever life took me, I compliantly followed along.  And those who came in my life benefited from the desire to make people happy (avoid the wrath), so I was a great employee and too often, a doormat in a relationship, whether it was a romantic one or a friendship.

So, I could never see myself making some of the decisions that Cheryl Strayed made, because I was programmed to do all of the “right” things….. the safe,  the conservative, the unassuming, meek, timid, don’t-draw-attention-to-yourself choices.  But I could see myself as Bobbi… looking for something better late in life, finally willing to take a chance on life and do something for herself.  Which I have.  I had to grow a lot just to be willing to take this course.  And now I’m seeing just how much there is to learn and grow.  And recognizing and acknowledging these thoughts is the first step in being able to change them.

And here’s a perfect example…

The bacon.

Saturday morning I had an appointment.  The week before had been my husbands last week at work after a 40 year career.  Friday night, he cut his finger pretty badly (but was too tough to go to the ER), so I helped him clean it up and and bandage it.  (Not relevant to the story, but I didn’t want you to think I left him to bleed to death on his own!) haha

So, Saturday morning…. we got up and I started breakfast.  Typically I stick to a quick veggie omelet, but he just retired from a 40 year career!  That was a huge accomplishment!  And he hurt his finger, and I’m a nurturer by nature.  And he loves bacon!  So, the story unfolds…..

The problem?  I didn’t have time to fix the bacon because I had an appointment.  Did he ask for bacon?  NO!  But my subby said, “it’s the right thing to do!  Make him something special for breakfast!”  So, I put the bacon in the pan and scurried around the kitchen trying to get everything else taken care of, all the while telling myself that I didn’t have time to cook the bacon. The next thing I knew, the bacon was burnt.  Not just extra crispy bacon, but black, burnt to a crisp, inedible bacon!  So, not only did we not have bacon with our omelets, but I was also late for my appointment.

Who’s fault was that?

Mine.

My intentions were good, but I let my subby overrule my decisions.  There was plenty of time and plenty of opportunities to do something special for him.  And did I mention…. he didn’t ask for it.

So, now that I have recognized that, I can address it.  It’s not that it’s a negative thought and, from all accounts, it seemed like a really nice thing to do.  But I was letting subby put others before me – I wasn’t in the driver’s seat of my own life!

It’s time to take back the wheel! And I am forever grateful for obtaining to tools to do just that through MKE!

Thanks for stopping by!

MKE – Week 13 – Where have I been?

I looked up and – BOOM!  I was 3 weeks behind!

I would have to do some digging to see exactly where I got lost, but I’ve just had a lot going on in my life, along with most everyone else, I’m sure.  After all, it is the biggest holiday season in the USA.  I’m not using that as an excuse.  However, added to they “normal” holiday stuff, I also had a birthday, my husband was working 84+ hours/week, my son’s album campaign took some of my attention (including a trip to Atlanta to visit him for a few days – my birthday gift to myself), and then, my husband retired from his job of 40+ years.  So, I’ve had a few distractions.

I’ll be honest and say, I struggled with where to put my priorities during this time with so many things going on at once.  After all, at the core, no matter what my PPN’s are, the depth and security and foundation of my family relationships are the most important things to me, bar none.  So, does that mean I need to change my PPN’s?  I found myself pondering the words Paul, in Romans 7:15, “For I do not understand what I do.  For what I want to do do I do not do, but what I hate I do.”  Not that I hate either version – but when I want to do something for myself, I find myself diverting to do for others.  But I think that thought is one I will expand on in another post.

For the time being, I hope everyone had a beautifully blessed Christmas, or whatever holiday you celebrate, and I wish everyone a most wonderful and prosperous 2019!

Thanks for stopping by!

MKE – Week 12 – A little update…

Well, it’s December 29th, and tomorrow we are starting Week 15, so….  I’m a little behind.

Since my last post was about my son, I thought I would take a minute and update the status of his endeavor.  But first, I want to share this amazing caricature of him that a friend of his created for him and made it into a poster advertisement for his upcoming show.

As I mentioned in the previous post, every read of Scroll III reminded me of him.  I do not know the artist who drew this, nor do I know if she has ever read Og, but the image she created, in my eyes, shows a perfect parallel in my son and in Og’s words, “I will avoid despair, but if this disease of the mind should infect me, then I will work on in despair. I will toil and I will endure.  I will ignore the obstacles at my feet and keep mine eyes on the goals above my head.” Note the anchor attached to his foot and the water rising, but he plays on with passion.  This is the perfect image of my son.

And what I see in him, I can only see because it exists within me.

So, back to the update…  he persisted until he succeeded!  His Kickstarter campaign was fully funded and he is playing his album funding celebration show tonight in Atlanta!  I am grateful to everyone who participated, whether I know them or not.  Thank you!

And I will persist until I succeed, which is why I am buckling down to get myself caught up on my commitments!

Thanks for stopping by!

MKE – Week 11 – OH, My Son!

With each read of “The Scroll Marked III,” I find myself thinking of my son.  I was a single mom all of his life.  Just me and him (against the world, as the song goes).  And I’ve spent many, many nights….many…wondering if I did all the right things, taught him what he needed to know, gave him the tools the tackle this thing we call life.  Did I do enough?  Did I do too much?  Did I….?

He turned thirty last week.

He was always a smart kid.  He was in advanced classes since his 2nd grade teacher recognized that his “hyper-activity” was really boredom. (Thank you Mrs. Baker, wherever you are!) But the things that made his eyes light up, as far back as I can remember, was entertaining people.  Even at 5 and 6 years old, he always made me laugh.  His goals ranged from being a college level English/Lit professor, to writing a book, to being President.  I remember a conversation we had about a certain friend planning to go to a certain college to become an architectural engineer.  He was somewhat distraught about his friend doing this because, apparently the friend had shared that it wasn’t really what he wanted to do, but what his dad expected him to do.  A family trade.  And he informed me right away that he had no interest of going into the mortgage industry.

Then, at 14, he asked for a guitar for Christmas.  It was actually his 2nd guitar, as he had gotten a small one as a toddler from a relative.  We have a very musically talented family, none of which I received, so I suppose it was to be expected.  He didn’t show much interest at the time.  However, from 14 until today, there hasn’t been a day that he hasn’t held an instrument in his hand for some part of the day.  And even though he stayed true to his first dream and obtained his AA in English/Literature, the call of the music weighed on him and he switched his last two years of college to a focus on music.  He has relentlessly pursued that endeavor ever since.

He turned thirty last week.

The music industry is not for the faint of heart.  It’s been over ten years of writing songs, busking on the sidewalks, playing for weddings, open-mics, festivals, playing in local clubs all over Atlanta and even traveling across the country with his band.  He stays true to his dream.  But, life happens.  He’s found a connection between his writing (Eng/Lit background) and his music (teaching lessons and managing other musicians), which has led him to a decision to become an advertising copywrite (and yes, that’s how they spell it in the curriculum).  So for the past year, he juggled multiple jobs with a full-time class schedule.

Sounds pretty rosy, so far, huh?

What you don’t see from the surface is this….those “life” events I referred to.  They left him with no car and no ability to finance one, so he rides his bicycle or public transportation everywhere.  His girlfriend didn’t want to wait until he finished college because she wants a family (which he wants terribly, as well), so she broke up with him.  His dad, whom he didn’t have opportunity to meet until he was 18, passed away this year from cancer.  And I recently learned that he lost his apartment, which he has been living in with no heat for the past 4 months.  And on the day he planned to move, he borrowed a pick-up truck, and his friends that were supposed to help him, backed out because it was cold and raining.  So, he moved all of his furniture by himself in a pickup truck.  And yes, he has had days they these things have had him in a state of despair, but he works on in despair.  He does not quit.  He does not give up.

He will persist until he succeeds.

And while he works to complete this degree so that he can obtain a job that will pay him a sufficient amount to own a car and not have to go without heat in his house, he still pursues his dream.  On his 30th birthday, he launched a Kickstarter campaign to produce an album that he is immensely passionate about, with his band.  He writes all of the songs and music and they have a style all their own.

And so I tell you all of this to go back to the beginning and say, yes, I did enough.  Seeing his strength, even in the trials; seeing his persistence, even when he’s left alone in the cold pouring rain; seeing his bravery and willingness to come back to his dream goals, “in spite of the sting of the blade;” I did enough.  I see in him that he does not accept failure and he will never consider defeat.  He ignores the obstacles and keeps his eyes on his goals.

And he learned that from me.

He will persist until he succeeds.

He turned thirty last week.

I will persist until I succeed.